This Thanksgiving, as I watch the annual Turkey Day Marathon, as they try to get enough funding for season 14 (at the writing of this they are over halfway to their goal, and it doesn't look good), I thought I'd plunk down my two cents for any future making of any future episodes.
1. Better Writing. Ever since MST3k came back to Netflix and most recently The Gizmoplex, one thing has bothered me. The poor writing. It's just not that funny. Perhaps Joel needs to look for writers from the Midwest. Let's face it, Mike Nelson and the guys at Rifftrax are the better writers. Even The Mads have proven to be better writers. Maybe Joel should merge the new MST3k with Rifftrax or hire Trace and Frank to work on the future seasons.
2. Better Hosts. Emily is my least favorite host. It's not that she's a woman, if she was a man, she still wouldn't be that funny to me. I'm sure she was good at the MST3k road show, but on the show, she's overacting like crazy and that makes ME crazy. Tone it down Emily, you're acting to a camera, not an auditorium of people. Act normal, and if this is normal for you, switch to decaf. The only two people who are doing a good job at acting are Jonah Ray and Patton Oswalt. Everyone else on the cast, watch these two and learn from these two. Overacting hurts everyone.
3. Better Pizza...no wait, Better Bad Movies? I know, I know. You get what you get. But there have got to be some more old movies somewhere. Heck, Rifftrax has found some goodies, see if you can get with them. Goes back to merging with Rifftrax as a good idea.
So those are three ideas to get Joel's movie riffing empire back on the right track.
Feel free to take it or leave it, Mr. Hodgson.
And if you read this before Saturday, give Joel a dime or two. Please and Thank You.